this sucks

This is one of those things that when anyone asks "when did you hear about it", I'll remember where I was.

I was sitting talking with Li Ming, just before going into 'Lust, Caution' (mm Tony Leung... but scary Tony Leung, really), and I checked a text on my phone... the text was from Marc, and it said "Heath Ledger died from a drug overdose. What is up?!".

And it really clocked me for 6. I'm not sure why, and I'm actually a little ashamed about how much this has affected me. First there was denial, that it was some kind of bad taste publicity stunt. Then there was a pall cast over the whole day, every now and again I'd think of it and feel... just more disbelief I guess, kept checking the news sites, reading post after post of people feeling the same way - oh it's so sad, think of this kid, think of his ex, think of (trust AV clubbers to say this one) Terry Gilliam - and it's spilled over to today, still checking the news - I just want to know what happened, what the fuck happened?!

It's not even as if I really liked him - in that fan-girl way, I mean - I just thought he was a great actor, and he had a wonderful career both behind and in front of him. I couldn't wait to see what he did next, and when I saw the prologue of the next Batman at the IMax theatre, my mouth was literally open with the genius of his Joker. And now there will be no more Joker, and watching Batman won't be the joyous experience it could have been, because he's gone. There will be no more anything from this amazing presence, and it really sucks.

That's the only way I can articulate it.

Breakfast:
a milo and a peach.

verdict:
still bummed.